Who Makes You Laugh?

[Soulmanure]

This is funny
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Sv5iEK-IEzw

This is an absolute classic. "That's Jeff Vader, that is."

[EugeneSax]

30 today apparently:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hzqdDoe8FoM&NR=1

[nicwing]

Friend from the US just sent me this, don't often pass thes on but this is a doozie!!


ANYONE WANT TO WRITE A BOOK?

For all lovers of good writing, here are the 2009 winners of the Bulwer-Lytton contest, (aka "It Was a dark and Stormy Night" Contest) run by the English Department of San Jose State University, wherein one writes only the first line of a bad novel.


10. As a scientist, Throckmorton knew that if he were ever to break wind in the echo chamber, he would never hear the end of it.
9. Just beyond the Narrows , the river widens.

8. With a curvaceous figure that Venus would have envied, a tanned unblemished oval face framed with lustrous thick brown hair, deep azure-blue eyes fringed with long black lashes, perfect teeth that vied for competition, and a small straight nose, Marilee had a beauty that defied description.

7. Andre, a simple peasant, had only one thing on his mind as he crept along the East wall: "Andre creep... Andre creep...Andre creep."

6. Stanislaus Smedley, a man always on the cutting edge of narcissism, was about to give his body and soul to a back alley sex-change surgeon to become the woman he loved.

5. Although Sarah had an abnormal fear of mice, it did not keep her from eking out a living at a local pet store.

4. Stanley looked quite bored and somewhat detached, but then penguins often do.

3. Like an over-ripe beefsteak tomato rimmed with cottage cheese, the corpulent remains of Santa Claus lay dead on the hotel floor.

2. Mike Hardware was the kind of private eye who didn't know the meaning of the word "fear;" a man who could laugh in the face of danger and spit in the eye of death -- in short, a moron with suicidal tendencies.

AND THE WINNER IS...
1. The sun oozed over the horizon, shoved aside darkness, crept along the greensward, and, with sickly fingers, pushed through the
castle window, revealing the pillaged princess, hand at throat, crown asunder, gaping in frenzied horror at the sated, sodden amphibian lying beside her, disbelieving the magnitude of the frog's deception, screaming madly, "You lied!"

[nicwing]

Police in Liverpool just announced the discovery of an arms cache of 2000 semi automatic rifles with 250,000 rounds of ammunition, 10 anti-tank missiles, 4 grenade launchers, 20 tonnes of heroin, ?50 million in forged UK banknotes and 25 trafficked Ukrainian prostitutes all in a semi- detached house behind the Public Library in Toxteth.

Local residents were stunned.

A community spokesman said:

"We're shocked. We never knew we had a f***n' Library!!"

[satch]

Gandalf: "A wizard is never late, Frodo Baggins. Nor is he early. He arrives precisely when he means to."

Frodo: "You're not fooling anyone, that was premature ejaculation and you know it."
__________________

[nicwing]

I knew Amsterdam was pretty gay, but I had no idea about the Hague.

[nicwing]

Whoever said "money can't buy happiness" never got a 900$-an-hour Ukrainian hooker who will blow you with a mouth full of wasabi mustard.

http://twitter.com/FATJEW

[nicwing]

George Michael has written a new song already about his skinhead cellmate...He's called it 'Hairless Fister'.

[Boss Hog]

I see the pope's aide, Cardinal Walter Kasper has pulled out at the last minute. Good to see he's practising what he preaches!!

[Aussiewaz]

Monty Python in all it's guises and that bloody Canteen Incident video get me.

[MarkSDMF]

Jesus I forgot how amazingly funny dear Eddie Is lol.
I passed by him in Aberdeen last year whilst he was doing the whole jogging round the f***ing universe thing :P

Although this guy is a smart funny guy.

[MarkSDMF]

[MarkSDMF]

Damn it, i cant embed a video !
GRR
Anyway it was Bill Hicks.
Here the blasted video link.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vX1CvW38cHA

:coffee2:

[Soulmanure]

Patton Oswalt cracks me up:

[celsis]

This is brilliant!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T-RkuXPj3Q4&feature=related