Who Makes You Laugh?

[nicwing]

A conversation overheard on the VHF Guard (emergency) frequency 121.5 MHz while flying from Europe to Dubai .

It's too good not to pass along..

The conversation went like this...
Iranian Air Defence Radar: 'Unknown aircraft you are in Iranian airspace. Identify yourself.'
Aircraft: 'This is a United States aircraft. I am in Iraqi airspace.'
Air Defence Radar: 'You are in Iranian airspace. If you do not depart our airspace we will launch interceptor aircraft!'
Aircraft: 'This is a United States Marine Corps FA-18 fighter. Send 'em up, I'll wait!'
Air Defence Radar: (no response .... total silence)

[HabanoSy]

LOL...!!!

Great response...!!!

Cheers, HabanoSy

[nicwing]

A US army platoon was marching north of Fallujah when they came upon an insurgent, badly injured and unconscious.

On the opposite side of the road was a British soldier in a similar but less serious state. The soldier was conscious and alert and as first aid was given to both men; the platoon leader asked the injured soldier what had happened?

The soldier reported, "I was moving north along the highway here, and coming south was a heavily armed insurgent. We saw each other and both took cover in the ditches along the road.

I yelled to him that Saddam Hussein was a miserable, low-life scumbag who'd got what he deserved, and he yelled back that Gordon Brown is a fat, useless, lying one-eyed porridge eater and Lord Mandelson is a pillow-biting gay bastard!

So I said that Osama Bin Laden dresses and ponces about like a frigid, hatchet-faced lesbian.

He retaliated by yelling, "Oh yeah? Well, so does Harriet Harman!"

"And, there we were, in the middle of the road, shaking hands, when a bloody bus hit us."

[celsis]

British Airways pilot was flying into Dusseldorf airport for the first time in 1956. ATC told him to go to Apron 4 and wait. The pilot took a wrong turn and ended on Apron 5.

The ATC sked him, "You are on de wrong Apron! Haf you neffer been to Dusseldorf before?"

"I have," answered the pilot, "but it was in 1944 and we didn't land....."

[jdawg]

A conversation overheard on the VHF Guard (emergency) frequency 121.5 MHz while flying from Europe to Dubai .

It's too good not to pass along..

The conversation went like this...
Iranian Air Defence Radar: 'Unknown aircraft you are in Iranian airspace. Identify yourself.'
Aircraft: 'This is a United States aircraft. I am in Iraqi airspace.'
Air Defence Radar: 'You are in Iranian airspace. If you do not depart our airspace we will launch interceptor aircraft!'
Aircraft: 'This is a United States Marine Corps FA-18 fighter. Send 'em up, I'll wait!'
Air Defence Radar: (no response .... total silence)

thats great stuff...

[jdawg]

British Airways pilot was flying into Dusseldorf airport for the first time in 1956. ATC told him to go to Apron 4 and wait. The pilot took a wrong turn and ended on Apron 5.

The ATC sked him, "You are on de wrong Apron! Haf you neffer been to Dusseldorf before?"

"I have," answered the pilot, "but it was in 1944 and we didn't land....."

good one!

[HabanoSy]

British Airways pilot was flying into Dusseldorf airport for the first time in 1956. ATC told him to go to Apron 4 and wait. The pilot took a wrong turn and ended on Apron 5.

The ATC sked him, "You are on de wrong Apron! Haf you neffer been to Dusseldorf before?"

"I have," answered the pilot, "but it was in 1944 and we didn't land....."

LOL...!!!

Cheers, HabanoSy

[rokkitsci]

Britisher Ship: Please divert your course 0.5 degrees to the south to avoid a collision.

Reply: Recommend you divert your course 15 degrees to the South to avoid a collision.

Inglelander Ship: This is the Captain of a Ship of the Royal Navvie. I say again, divert your course.

Reply: Noooo... I say again, you divert YOUR course!

RN Ship: THIS IS THE AIRCRAFT CARRIER HIS MAJESTY'S BOLLOCKS, WE ARE A LARGE WARSHIP OF THE ROYALE NAVYES. DIVERT YOUR COURSE NOW!!

Reply: This is a lighthouse. Your call.

[tippexx]

Deleted

[Eagles59]

Bill Engvall

[ronin]

My ex wife

[MaledettoToscano]

Taylor Mali... one little clit of the mouse LOL

[Gordonbcb]

Call me a big kid, but I still laugh out loud at Tom & Jerry

[satch]

Catwalk fall about

This gets me giggling...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_0eINGyJHz8&feature=related

[Boss Hog]

I'm trying these new underwater smokes...... scuban cigars!