Tales from the front

[Sean]

What about number 2's

[Timfy]

We're in the news!

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2875910/999-workers-Scotland-Yard-call-centre-claim-bosses-following-toilet-enforce-strict-five-minute-rule.html

And its true.

Pretty standard call centre stuff, unfortunately. What's funny is that I've seen management spend a fortune on enforcing things like that, only aiming for very small (marginal) savings or gains in efficiency. It's the same with holiday. What's funny is every time they try and enforce harsh rules around breaks, holiday, etc. Sickness and absenteeism just go through the roof and they never follow the correct processes when trying to get rid of people for it meaning they rarely manage to sack them so it's all an exercise in futility & they'd be better of treating staff better in the first place!

I thought I had it bad with some of the calls I have to take (have had the "erotic groaning" too. I'm sure there are people who do that just to get off on the thought of being listened to...) Thankfully we don't have any distressing or difficult calls to deal with. Fair play as it must be a challenging job!

[ValeTudoGuy]

I worked in callcentres for around 6 years, strange places somehow disconnected to reality. Normally a great workforce continually being unfairly hounded by management and constantly squeezed for "Efficiency" I saw people drained of all hope who were like the walking dead after a year.

Incentives to motivate staff were half hearted and thoughtless, and the only people who seemed to get promoted were corporate buffoons. Who were either blind to everything or just shut their eyes to it for the sake of their career.

Any manager who genuinely cared had that beaten out of them by the constant shitstorms rolling down hill from the ops managers who without fail thought they were the season's hot shit in business.... without fail they were bloody idiots!

[Timfy]

I worked in callcentres for around 6 years, strange places somehow disconnected to reality. Normally a great workforce continually being unfairly hounded by management and constantly squeezed for "Efficiency" I saw people drained of all hope who were like the walking dead after a year.

Incentives to motivate staff were half hearted and thoughtless, and the only people who seemed to get promoted were corporate buffoons. Who were either blind to everything or just shut their eyes to it for the sake of their career.

Any manager who genuinely cared had that beaten out of them by the constant shitstorms rolling down hill from the ops managers who without fail thought they were the season's hot shit in business.... without fail they were bloody idiots!

Our place wasn't too bad until 2012 (I joined in 2007.) It all went a bit wrong from 2012 when it was bought by a well-known American private equity entity. It's now been "benchmarked" against other call centres, meaning 20% less salary, massive reduction in performance related bonus, barely any employee benefits, the bare minimum break/lunch/holiday allowance and a sickness/absenteeism/lateness policy that if they were even halfway competent enough to actually enforce as strongly as they try would mean they'd be left with nobody left to answer calls at all as they'd have sacked us all! (1 minute late taking calls in the morning and it's often straight into a disciplinary process where management waste hours of everybody's time for absolutely no reason, especially annoying when it's often due to the poor IT/systems and quite easy to prove when you've been trying to get the bloody phone working for half an hour unpaid before you were due to start just to stand half a chance of logging in on time.)

I'm only just starting to see why Call Centres have a bad name (to the point that many people I know would refuse to hire a manager who has worked in the call centre environment, as it's so far removed from the real world and often rewards the least skilled individuals.)

[PeeJay]

I've just taken a call from a nice older lady who's been burgled this evening. The burglar used her computer to Google sex chat lines! Hope he left fingerprints on the keyboard.

[Wigan]

I've just taken a call from a nice older lady who's been burgled this evening. The burglar used her computer to Google sex chat lines! Hope he left fingerprints on the keyboard.

Yeah that old story. It wasn't me googling porn the burglar did it and ran away

[peanutpete]

it's ok I was wearing gloves

[PeeJay]

Caller - 'I'm ringing about a car that has been parked outside my house for six months'
Me - 'Okay, what's the registration number?'
Caller - 'Hold on, I'll go and have a look'

What planet are these people on? Turns out it belonged to the man next door but one.

[MattKernow]

When I was a student I applied to work for a double glazing companies call centre in Plymouth. Within 5 minutes I was told the following:

1. We lock the doors so you can't leave during a shift
2. If you dont make 10 sales in first 3 days, dont come back and you wont get paid

It was at that point I called them some expletives and walked out!

I can believe everything everyone has said about call centres. If you work in one, you have my sympathy!

MK

[PeeJay]

Aaaaargh! I have just taken a call from a woman reporting her 15 year old daughter missing. She went out at 9.30pm last Friday and hasn't seen her since though she's had a few drunken phone calls from her. What happened to boundaries and parental control?

[PeeJay]

Something useful now. Do you remember when the Charlie Hebdu killers were holed up in that factory and the guy inside was texting police. Do you know how he did it? Neither did I so I looked it up. Just text REGISTER to 999 and follow the instructions when they reply. I hope none of us are in a situation when we need emergency services but can't speak but its certainly worth being prepared.

[PeeJay]

This afternoon I took a call from a man complaining that police put his door in and didn't repair it to his satisfaction. What am I going to do about it? Well of course I promised to send an officer round within the hour to talk to him about getting it repaired of course, would he be in to see them? 'I'll make a point of it' says he. Easiest arrest enquiry ever I reckon. Sitting duck, he's wanted for theft

[Sean]

This afternoon I took a call from a man complaining that police put his door in and didn't repair it to his satisfaction. What am I going to do about it? Well of course I promised to send an officer round within the hour to talk to him about getting it repaired of course, would he be in to see them? 'I'll make a point of it' says he. Easiest arrest enquiry ever I reckon. Sitting duck, he's wanted for theft

Back of the net

[Johnny Thunder]

Crazy thread. I've just read the lot.
You certainly have to put up with some idiots PJ.

[PeeJay]

Crazy thread. I've just read the lot.
You certainly have to put up with some idiots PJ.

Its the idiots that brighten the day sometimes