What to do with fake Cigars?

[butternutsquashpie]

So I've got a box of fake Esplendidos from a mate of mine who just got back from Cuba. (Comes to me with them shouting that he got 25 of them for 100 Dollars when i'm here spending 100 dollars for Five of em). The lady on the front of the box is so deformed it looks like a troll
Anyways, they're actually not half bad. They have the creamy taste of a regular esplendido (tuned down two leagues or so) and they're not too.
However, one thing wrong: they are rolled terribly. I would light em up and five minutes later, the end would look like I just lit it with a Cherry Bomb. Burns terribly then gets too hot because its packed with around half the tobacco as a regular Esplendido.

What can I do with these? The leaves aren't half bad, but the make up is terrible. So I Don't feel like wasting them because of the good leaves.

[mattyhall22]

Find a nice young lady with firm thighs to re roll them for you :-)

[Eddie]

Buy a pipe. Rub out and smoke.

[El Catador]

Just smoke 'em!
Occasionally, some of them turn out to be pretty good.

[Sligub]

Keep them as a novelty or bin them. You've no idea what's been done to/sprayed on/ added to them

[butternutsquashpie]

Keep them as a novelty or bin them. You've no idea what's been done to/sprayed on/ added to them

Ah, but it can't be worse than what's in a cigarette, haha.
Sides, it's not like a Cuban lifeguard has access to cyanide

Buy a pipe. Rub out and smoke.

Is that truely do-able though??
I was thinking of cutting the cigars into small 7mm disks and unwrapping each disk into long strands to shove in my pipe. Would that be a good idea?

[Mozwik]

Grind them up and make snuff.

[Eddie]

Is that truely do-able though??
I was thinking of cutting the cigars into small 7mm disks and unwrapping each disk into long strands to shove in my pipe. Would that be a good idea?

Next time one falls apart try it. I reckon it should work. You may need to do a little tearing as well as rubbing.

[butternutsquashpie]

You may need to do a little tearing as well as rubbing.

Wait, what's rubbing??
and I was hoping to eliminate tearing cause I could just cut the cigars into the disks with my guillotine. So they'll already be in narrow, long strands.

[Eddie]

Rubbing is as it sounds, rub between palms to break up. As you would with flake tobacco.